I recently hosted an Ask Me Anything on Reddit. During the course of having done so, I was approached by the co-founder of Revolve Magazine. He loved what I had posted, and wanted me to write a submission to a book that they are putting together; a collection of short unconventional lessons and stories. I mistook his directions as 1400 words, as opposed to 1400 characters (only 300 words), and so this is the first draft that I produced for him. I thought it was apt to publish it here.
I'd like to add that I began the AMA in response to the new proposed BillC36. I'm not usually one to tout my ideological beliefs in a public forum, but this demanded some reaction.
So here is, for your consumption, my thoughts on Prostitution. Please feel free to ask further questions in the comments section. I would be thrilled to answer them in a future post such as this.
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Hello. My name is Angie Nash. I am 28 years old, and I have been a sexworker since I was 24.
When my parents ask me what I do for a living, I tell them that I help people. I am a Life Coach, as well as the Administrative Assistant for a friend’s small business. Which is as close to the truth as they can handle, being small town people. However, my full job description is slightly more convoluted than all that.
I am a Professional Companion, and Professional Switch. This means that my list of services combines the skills of a Life Coach and a Call Girl and adds some Fetish and Kinky fun for those clients who desire that sort of thing.
I am affiliated with a Dungeon here in Toronto, called the Den of Nine Tails. We host themed Play Parties the first Saturday of every month, as well as other events such as a casual smokers night, foot fetish nights, foodie parties, and more.
My role at Nine Tails is two fold. As a ‘Cat’ of Nine Tails, I pay a membership that grants me access to each of the parties where I can mix and mingle with prospective clients. I also donate my time to help setup and cleanup for events, as well as act as hostess or door person.
On the flip side, I am also Personal Assistant to the CEO of Den of Nine Tails. My opinion is heavily weighed on matters of policy and procedure. I also play a heavy role in the administrative aspects of Nine Tails, such as crafting the written media that we send out into the world, whether it be blog posts, event listings, flyers, or emails.
I recently hosted an Ask Me Anything post on Reddit. I’m not generally one to tout my philosophical or political ideals in public forums. However, the new proposed BillC36 seems to be designed for a world in which no woman in her right mind would choose to prostitute herself short of being forced to, or having no other means of supporting herself. Excuse me while I beg to differ.
I am a (mostly) healthy young woman who is secure in her own skin, and very promiscuous. I enjoy sex, sexuality, and sensuality. I am a trained sub and Domme. I am an effective Life Coach. I don’t just lay on my back and spread my legs. I work hard for my money! I enjoy working with a client to explore their own minds and bodies. I love to hear that I have helped a client to overcome some personal obstacle.
I have worked what Society insists on calling ‘normal’ jobs. I am well skilled and easily employable. In fact, I often feel bad watching so many of my friends struggle to find a job that they enjoy, when I have loved and excelled at every job that I have ever had. I had to quit my last job (climbing the ladder towards management at a call centre) due to health complications. I have a long term illness called Fibromyalgia.
Now, before you start thinking that the Fibro is a factor meaning that ‘I have no other means of supporting myself’, let me assure you that many people suffering from Fibromyalgia have full and gratifying jobs. Just look at Morgan Freeman.
I am a sexworker because I WANT to be a sexworker. I want to live in a world where sexwork is considered ‘legitimate’ work. If a man can make money slinging boxes because he is strong and likes manual labour, why is it so wrong for a female (or someone of any gender) who loves herself and her body (most of the time) to share that with other people and make money at it?
I grew up in a world where prostitution was considered taboo, sinful, dirty, and even illegal. I have not let that stop me from chasing my dreams, from jumping into the creation of Den of Nine Tails with both feet. We are striving to create a safe, luxurious and clean space in which people can meet and share their interests in all things sensual and sexual. We want to create a place where people can network and share skills and information without fear of harsh judgement nor direct ridicule. Ours is a goal of community and mutual aide.
If you've read some of my other posts, you'll find a theme: I love sex, sure, but I also love Humanity. I want to learn as much as I can about it. And I feel that sexuality and sensuality are a healing tool. I want to help people.
Ha! My job is significantly more than simply lying on my back. It's one of the most labor and emotionally intensive jobs I've ever had. Add the administrative aspects of my job, and it's also one of the more cerebral jobs I've ever had.
It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to build a Sex Workers Co-op and Adult Club from the ground up, so you'll have to excuse me if I disagree with those that tell me to get off of my sleazy ass and get a ‘normal job’.
Normal is an obsolete word. I don't find doing for pay, something which I enjoy and am good at, and would be doing on my free time anyway, a sleazy way to make money. How is what I do different than massage therapy, or any other therapeutic profession?
I should also mention that I have two much younger sisters, as well a couple of nephews.I love kids. In a recent Question and Answer forum, I had someone more or less accuse me of being a poisonous influence on the younger generation. While I am a recruiter for Den of Nine Tails, I specifically avoid talking about how to get started in sexwork in a public forum because I don't want anyone doing this because they think it's the easy way out, or because it sounds cool.
I recruit those already active in kink or sex work. I'm not a conscriptor, nor a drafter. I wish to introduce people to a safe and supportive environment where they can do what they love, not telling them to quit their job and start turning tricks. I'm not saying that you should spend your life savings, or the money for your kid's future on a call girl. I'm saying, if massage therapy, or hypnosis, or drinking yourself into oblivion isn't working for you, maybe try something a little less self destructive.
I do not expect the nay sayers to give up their point of view, nor their opinions. I would prefer that they accept that it is just that: One view, and one opinion, as opposed to fact. I am not ashamed of myself, nor my chosen profession. I am a very successful human being, and have likely successfully overcome more obstacles in the past three years than most people do in a decade.
In the event that you are thinking to yourself, “That’s all well and good for you. but what about those of us with body image issues?”, let me assure you, I am not at ease with mine. I spend several hours a week in varying stages of undress in front of other people, a camera, or, Gods forbid, in a public setting. I struggle every day to accept that others find my body beautiful, that I am beautiful, with varying degrees of success. The only way to conquer your demons is to face them. So here I tread, in all my naked glory!
In closing, I say to you, do what you love! No matter who you’re going to disappoint, offend, or alienate! If it is something that you are passionate about, then go for it! It will be worth all of the opposition, all of the burned bridges, and all of the dissenting opinions!
